I am a Vegetable

I am an onion.

Sliced in half.

The more layers I shed

The smaller I become.

Don't mistake this for negativity

Cause as I'm sliced and diced

I multiply

I take up more space

And with my pieces

What's cooked is great.

I assisted a wedding tonight with Shannon my boss and they had a live band there from Atlanta called Crystal Clear Band. The sax player was playing on a 40yr old saxophone it looked so antique but man was this band great! Everyone was getting it, the drummer, the bass guitarist, the singers, pianist, and of course the saxophone... it is my favorite jazz instrument.

During one of the songs I actually teared up watching them play. I can't watch someone play the saxophone without thinking of you. Watching them passionately play and move on stage, reminded me of something that someone will one day hopefully appreciate the way i would. Right then and there a layer was pulled off of me like an onion. And with every layer off the aroma causes your eyes to fill with tears. Had to catch myself real quick. I was gonna text you but I was working and my phone was dead. Then when I got home I decided to just tell you Happy Easter instead...
I don't know that you need to know these things, I know it doesn't phase you. In terms of progress and getting over each other you are oh so far ahead. Its a total contradiction cause I know these things don't phase you but telling you makes me feel like I'm influencing your head.

Before the ceremony, Shannon hid the bride Whitney down a hall, turner the corner and had her hide behind the wall just exposing her hand. Then he had the groom come down the same hall and stopped him right before he would turn the corner. He photographed them hold hands for a moment. The moment their hands touched they smiled sincere, with excitement, in love. He didn't see her and she didn't see him yet their eyes glowed with the embrace of their finger tips as if they were facing each other. Seconds passed and the photo was taken and the moment ended. He left the hallway to wait for his bride at the alter.

I'm so blessed and grateful for my experiences and the love that was learned. But through patience and my determination to be content I constantly find myself at a lost for what to do with these feelings. Their mature, full, passionate, and real as can be. I've oppressed them but now where do they go. I asked God to remove the heart ache and pain and he's answered that prayer but at the same time he's left me with something else to sort out...