Showing posts with label memoirs of anie. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memoirs of anie. Show all posts

Monday, July 22, 2013

I Deserve this S.M.I.L.E.

I deserve this smile
And it's effortless nature,
I deserve this warming sensation.

The feeling of satisfaction,
Described
Beyond word's education

Leaves me,
Never exhausted,
But rejuvenated
Hourly
Daily
Spiritually and emotionally.

My heart freaks out
And Melts inside.

I deserve this smile
And it's effortless nature,
I deserve this tingling sensation.

Not in the least
Do I exalt my pride,
For I am humbled by conversation
And the understanding prescribed.

I'm not sick.
I'm whole,
God by my side...
Damn it I deserve this smile
I dare not let it hide.

This smile is a blessing.
My gift from above
I'm grateful,
For its my testimony,
My statement about love.

Love taught by God,
Transcended from me to you


Left and Right,
And even you too.
This smile is here
Cause God is using you.

I deserve this smile.
And it's effortless nature,
I deserve this exchange
embrace
and teaching of affection.

Simply Motivated Interactions Lent Everyday

~Memoirs of Anie Lost&Found
 
 
Definition of the word: LEND
a (1): to give for temporary use on condition that the same or its equivalent be returned <lend me your pen> 
 

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Support & Reflection

I rushed over to my friend's side today cause she needed some support and uplifting.
Dora and I are so much a like, she needed some support and I was there right away.

Proud to be able to be there for her, we laughed, we prayed, and then we soaked away our doubts, concerns, and troubles in the pool. Savannah was 96 degrees today. and left the pool warm, well into the night. We took an evening dip and eventually ended up swimming all over the place. Talking and making jokes uplifting each other and relating.









When we came in she began telling me stories of her first precious moments with her and her man Kenny who she believes to be her future husband. Hearing her stories were funny but made me drop a tear or two on multiple occasions.
I reflected myself and boy was it such a heartache. It was a clear example as to why I need to be single. Nothing was perfect but the love....smh. I don't know how anyone could enjoy the company of someone else without remembering precious moments that occurred.

Egyptian Hold Yuh brings me back to an isolated street where I danced beneath the street light.
Under the moonlight on the beach after prom junior year.
The Passion
The way you cared for me when I was sick at Sunfest
The way we researched EVERYTHING lol
Smooth car rides in the slider, I used to love to watch you drive.
Lord knows I can't forget the night of Keewee's birthday party right before you took me home, The way the moonlight from the window silhouetted your body right before you introduced yourself to new terrain.
Oh the sweet sweet passion
The way you lead on the dance floor like a proper dance partner
The first time we danced kompa at Military Ball and was showered by love from our peers.
Those darn park rangers...
The video we made trying to educate other couples
The caution we took with our feelings: Like, Appreciate, Pear anie, Love you.
Embraces were never simple
Hours and hours of conversation
Hours and hours of just listening to each other breathe
Creating moments and techniques to call or firsts and lasts or never agains...

I could write a book.
Sometimes I want to.
But the memories I hold onto won't be released in a book
They will only be shared by every reader
Every reader would read the story and never predict its downfall
Every reader would read about a love for big screen
something real full or disagreements and arguments
that made us individuals who had an opinion
Two individuals attempting to live life as one.
Never people pleasers
If I wrote a book our story would never Die
It would only be relived and influence the lives of EVEN more people.

I always complained about my feelings.
I always said God blessed me with a love so beautiful and genuine, but where do I put these feelings?
I put them in my heart
I put them in my art
I put them toward my faith
I put them toward my praise
I teach with that love
I lift up others with that love
I relate with that love
I learned from that love.
It taught me what I'm capable of deserving and that only taught me I will NEVER compromise.
Its not about me comparing, or making someone else live up to that love.
That love can't be duplicated
But it did tell me what I deserve, showed me that I can be loved to purely and genuinely
And I want nothing less in my life, from here on ward.

I knew this process would be long for me.....

Memoirs of Anie


Thursday, May 9, 2013

I called for help

I called for help because I knew I couldn't do it alone.
I need prayer, so I called for help.

The devil tried to get me this evening.
The devil tried to overcome my spirit with sadness, depression, and lonliness.
But it will not be so because the blood of Christ still works and is covering me.

I tried to deal with the weight of the devil alone and I needed help.
I needed help so I called for help.
I called on my spiritual mother to enter battle with me
She refused to let the devil win
And she refused to let the devil use him as a vessel to get to me.

I'm going to bed early and alone and single.
And I'm unashamed.
God is blessing me and covering over my life.
I'm not going to let anyone or anything get in the way of the promise God has over my life.
It's not easy, no not at all
But I trust you God.
You'll never fail me.
A million others will fall short
But my God the places I know you will take me
I know are far greater.

Admist any pain I may experience I know you are in control...
Ignore my tears for they come from my flesh
Ignore my expression for it's only on the outside.
Hear my heart and I sing monologues of your truth and wisdom.
Father God I love you.
I thank you for never leaving my side
Comfort me father

Tonight
and Forever more


Memoirs of ANIE
a Believer  

Thursday, April 4, 2013

On this day in history...

On this day in history, Exactly 3 years  ago from today's date I wrote this poem. In response to a young man who asked me to Write him something deep... Little did he know that this poem would be followed by many others in the years to follow.

 
 
Love,
 
The Memoirs of Anie