Congratulations Envy

I'm really happy for you
Honest I am
But HonestLY the word happy can't fall out my mouth.
Anxiety
Can't Breathe
Hit my chest to get my heart back on beat
Be still...
I'm trying Lord
But I just can't help to wonder when it will be me
Saying cheese for the pictures I take
Soaking up the Congratulations and blessings thrown in my face
To my phone
And my timeline won't leave me alone
But I wait...
Cause I can't schedule what I can't control.

I won't lie I'm jelly
I want that to be me
Happiness
Rose petals
Throw rice at me!
Me and Mr. Unknown
Cause according to God its too soon
To reveal my future forever
So I wait...
Pause
Take a break
Congratulations Envy!
You're testing my faith.